Blog2005

Thursday, March 31, 2005

Sci Fi

The year is 2060. All engineers are filthy rich and the rest of the people are sad. Even doctors and lawyers....lol. Everything you see on the shelf is made in China (Actually, that already happened in 2010). Global warming is so bad, food sources are expensive. Fuel is depleted, an alternative fuel source is not readily available. People walk and cars are now left to rust in garages. Bicylces are now the mode of transportation. They don't clog up highways, and no one ever gets a speeding ticket. Traffic lights are obsolete since it doesnt hurt that much anyway when bicycles collide into each other. There's no problem with parking since future bikes are made of super strong, super light composites and can be folded into a backpack thanks to Materials Engineers. Chemical Engineers helped too. The food shortage coupled with the extreme heats are causing the people are now to be shorter since small bodies require less food and disperse heat more easily. The next generation of men are short. Women with tall husbands are busy fending off ditzy, dumb blondeshells.
Socialising no longer involves going to the beach/hanging out in the Malls/going out for ice cream (ice cream is as expensive as caviar now) People prefer to stay indoors and stay online the whole day chatting, blogging, video conferencing. And since no one ever goes out, people dont care about how they look anymore. This balances out the food shortage. With sedentary activity and less food, people dont get fat anymore.
Computers have replaced pets (all animals besides those that provide food are dead).


"K****** is a dying breed of man.", Kevin - 8:15 am/ASU Driver's Seat/ 31 March 2005

Saturday, March 26, 2005

Just A Point

Something the catholic church has kept hush hush is the issue of child molestation from priests. Being a catholic, I do not fully agree with how several cases have been handled, but I dont think just because a number of priests are sick, the whole church has to suffer. I found an article quite some time ago, but I believe I should put this one up for my own reference.
It's from http://www.catholic.com/library/A_Crisis_of_Saints.asp
A Crisis of Saints


By Fr. Roger Landry
April 2002

Headlines were captured in February by the tragic reports that as many as seventy priests in the Archdiocese of Boston, Massachusetts, allegedly have abused young people whom they were consecrated to serve. In the wake this news, allegations of sexual abuse by Catholic priests have sprung up nationwide. It is a huge scandal, one that many people who dislike the Catholic Church because of its moral teachings are using to claim that the Church is hypocritical and that they were right all along. Many people have come up to priests like myself to talk about it. I imagine many others have wanted to but have refrained out of respect or from not wanting to bring up bad news.

We need to tackle the issue head-on. Catholics have a right to it from their clergy. We cannot pretend it doesn't exist, and I would like to discuss what our response as faithful Catholics should be to this terrible situation.

The Judas syndrome

The first thing we need to do is to understand this scandal from the perspective of our faith in the Lord. Before he chose his first disciples, Jesus went up the mountain to pray all night (Luke 6:12). He had many followers at the time. He talked to his Father in prayer about whom he should choose to be his twelve apostles-the twelve whom he would form intimately, the twelve whom he would send out to preach the good news in his name. He gave them power to cast out demons. He gave them power to cure the sick. They watched him work countless miracles. They themselves worked countless others in his name.

Yet one of them tuned out to be a traitor. One who had followed the Lord-who had seen him walk on water and raise people from the dead and forgive sinners, one whose feet the Lord had washed-betrayed him. The gospels tells us that Judas allowed Satan to enter into him and then sold the Lord for thirty pieces of silver, handing him over by faking a gesture of love. "Judas," Jesus said to him in the garden of Gethsemane, "would you betray the Son of Man with a kiss?" (Luke 24:48).

Jesus didn't choose Judas to betray him. But Judas was always free, and he used his freedom to allow Satan to enter into him, and by his betrayal Jesus was crucified and executed. But God foresaw this evil and used to accomplish the ultimate good: the redemption of the world.

The point is, sometimes God's chosen ones betray him. That is a fact that we have to confront. If the early Christians had focused only on the scandal caused by Judas, the Church would have been finished before it even started to grow. Instead they recognized that you don't judge a movement by those who don't live it but by those who do. Rather than focusing on the betrayer, they focused on the other eleven on account of whose work, preaching, miracles, and love for Christ we are here today. It is on account of the other eleven-all of whom except John were martyred for Christ and for the gospel they proclaimed-that we ever heard the saving word of God, that we ever received the sacraments of eternal life.

We are confronted by the same scandalous reality today. We can focus on those who have betrayed the Lord, those who abused rather than loved the people whom they were called to serve. Or we can focus, as did the early Church, on those who have remained faithful, those priests who are still offering their lives to serve Christ and you out of love. The secular media almost never focuses on the good "eleven," the ones whom Jesus has chosen who remain faithful, who live lives of quiet holiness. But we the Church must keep the terrible scandal that we are witnessing in its true and full perspective.

Great saints of scandal born

Unfortunately, scandal is nothing new for the Church. There have been many times through the ages when things were much worse off than they are now. The history of the Church is like a cosine curve with many ups and downs. At the times when the Church hits its low points God raises up tremendous saints to bring the Church back to its real mission. It's almost as if in those times of darkness the light of Christ shines ever more brightly. I would like to focus on a couple of saints whom God raised up in such difficult times, because their wisdom can guide us during our own difficult time.

Francis de Sales came along after the Protestant Reformation. The Reformation was not principally about theology-although theological differences came later-but about morals. Martin Luther, an Augustinian priest, lived during the reign of perhaps the most notorious pope in history, Alexander VI. This pope never taught anything against the faith-the Holy Spirit prevented that-but he was a wicked man. He had nine children from six different concubines. He put out contracts on the lives of those he considered his enemies.

Luther, like everyone, must have wondered how God could allow a wicked man to be the visible head of his Church. All types of moral problems confronted Luther even in his own country of Germany. Priests were living in open relationships with women. Some made exaggerated claims about indulgences. There was terrible immorality among lay Catholics. Luther was scandalized, as anyone who loved God should have been. He allowed the scandal to drive him from the Church.

Eventually God raised up many saints to combat this erroneous solution and to bring people back to the Church Christ founded. Francis de Sales was one of them. At the risk of his life he went through Switzerland, where the Calvinists were popular, preaching the gospel with truth and love. Several times on his travels he was beaten and left for dead.

Someone once asked him to address the situation of the scandal caused by so many of his brother priests. What Francis de Sales said is as important for us today as it was then. He did not pull any punches. He said, "While those who give scandal are guilty of the spiritual equivalent of murder [i.e., destroying other people's faith in God by their terrible example], those who take scandal-who allow scandals to destroy their faith-are guilty of spiritual suicide." They are guilty, he said, of cutting off their life with Christ by abandoning the source of life in the sacraments, especially the Eucharist. He went among the people in Switzerland trying to prevent their committing spiritual suicide on account of the scandals. As a priest today I would say the same thing to you.

What should our reaction be then? Another saint who lived in a difficult time also can help us. Francis of Assisi lived in the thirteenth century, which was a time of terrible immorality in central Italy. Priests were setting horrible examples. Lay immorality was terrible, too. Francis himself while a young man gave scandal to others by his carefree ways. But eventually he was converted back to the Lord, founded the Franciscans, helped God rebuild his Church, and became one of the great saints of all time.

There is a story told of Francis of Assisi that sticks in my mind from one of the biographies I read as a seminarian. Once one of the brothers in the order of Friars Minor who was sensitive to scandal asked him, "Brother Francis, what would you do if you knew that a priest celebrating Mass had three concubines on the side?" Francis replied, "When it came time for Holy Communion, I would go to receive the sacred body of my Lord from the priest's anointed hands."

Francis was getting at a tremendous truth of the faith and a tremendous gift of the Lord: God has made the sacraments "priest-proof." No matter how holy or wicked a priest is, provided he has the intention to do what the Church does, then Christ himself acts through the priest, just as he acted through Judas when Judas ministered as an apostle. So whether Pope John Paul II or a priest on death row for a felony consecrates the bread and wine, it is Christ himself who acts to gives us his own body and blood. Francis was saying he was not going to let the wickedness or immorality of the priest lead him (Francis) to commit spiritual suicide.

Christ can work still and does work still even through the most sinful priest. And thank God! If we were dependent on the priest's personal holiness, we would be in trouble. Though they are chosen by God from among men, priests are tempted and fall into sin just like anyone else. But of course God knew that from the beginning. Eleven of the first twelve apostles scattered when Christ was arrested, but they came back.

The only authentic response

There has been a lot of talk in the media about what the response of the Church ought to be to these scandalous deeds. Does the Church have to do a better job in making sure no one with a predisposition toward pedophilia gets ordained? Absolutely. But that is not enough.

Does the Church have to do a better job in handling cases when they are reported? Absolutely. Though the Church's procedures for handling these cases are much better today than they were twenty years ago, they can always be improved. But even that is not enough.

Do we have to do more to support the victims of such abuse? Yes we do, both out of justice and out of love. But not even that is adequate. Cardinal Bernard Law has persuaded many of the medical school deans in Boston to work on establishing a center for the prevention of child abuse, which is something we should all support. But that by itself is not sufficient.

The only adequate response to this terrible scandal, the only fully Catholic response-as Francis of Assisi recognized in the 1200s, as Francis de Sales recognized in the 1600s, and as countless other saints have recognized in every century-is holiness. Every crisis that the Church faces, every crisis that the world faces, is a crisis of saints. Holiness is crucial because it is the real face of the Church.

There are always people-a priest meets them regularly, and you probably know several of them-who use excuses for why they don't practice the faith, why they commit spiritual suicide. It may be that a nun was mean to them when they were nine or that they find the teaching of the Church on a particular issue too burdensome. There are many people these days who say, "Why should I practice the faith, why should I go to church? The Church can't be true if God's so-called chosen ones can do the types of things we've been reading about!"

This scandal is a scaffold on which some will try to hang their justification for not practicing the faith. That is why personal holiness is so important. Such people need to find in all of us a reason for faith, a reason for hope, a reason for responding with love to the love of the Lord. The beatitudes in Christ's Sermon on the Mount are a recipe for holiness. We all need to live them more.

Do priests have to become holier? They sure do. Do religious brothers and sisters have to become holier and give ever-greater witness to God and heaven? Absolutely. All people in the Church have the vocation to be holy, and this crisis is a wake-up call.

It's a tough time to be a priest today. It's a tough time to be a Catholic today. But it's also a great time to be a priest and a great time to be a Catholic. Jesus says, "Blessed are you when men revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven" (Matt. 5:11-12).

I have been experiencing that beatitude firsthand, as have other priests I know. Earlier this week I had finished my exercise at a local gym and was coming out of the locker room dressed in my black clerical garb. Upon seeing me, a mother hurriedly moved her children out of the way and shielded them from me as I was passing. She glared at me as I passed, and when I was far enough away she finally relaxed and let her children go-as if I would have attacked them in the middle of the afternoon at a health club!

But while we all might have to suffer such insults and even slander on account of Christ, we should indeed rejoice. It's a great time to be a Christian, because this is a time in which God really needs us to show his true face. In bygone days in America, the Church was respected. Priests were respected. The Church had a reputation for holiness and goodness. Not so at the moment.

The Church will never fail

For almost three years of my life in the early 1990s, while in my car I listened to nothing but tapes by Bishop Fulton J. Sheen, one of the greatest Catholic preachers in American history. On a couple of his tapes for priests' retreats, Bishop Sheen said that he preferred to live in times when the Church has suffered rather than thrived, when the Church had to struggle, when the Church had to go against the culture. It was a time for real men and real women to stand up and be counted. "Even dead bodies can float downstream," he said, pointing that many people can coast when the Church is respected, "but it takes a real man, a real woman, to swim against the current."

How true that is. It takes a real man or a real woman to stand up against the current that is flowing against the Church. It takes a real man or a real woman to recognize that when you are resisting the flood of criticism, you are safest when you stay attached to the Rock on whom Christ built his Church. This is one of those times. It's a great time to be a Christian.

Some people are predicting that the Church is in for a rough time, and maybe it is. But the Church will survive because the Lord will make sure it survives. One of the greatest comeback lines in history was uttered two hundred years ago. As his armies were swallowing up the countries of Europe, French emperor Napoleon is reported to have said to Church officials, "Je détruirai votre église" ("I will destroy your Church")." When informed of the emperor's words, Ercole Cardinal Consalvi, one of the great statesmen of the papal court, replied, "He will never succeed. We have not managed to do it ourselves!" If bad popes, immoral priests, and countless sinners in the Church hadn't succeeded in destroying the Church from within, Cardinal Consalvi was saying, how did Napoleon think he was going to do it from without?

The Cardinal was pointing to a crucial truth: Christ will never allow his Church to fail. He promised that the gates of hell would not prevail against his Church (Matt. 16:18); that the barque of Peter, the Church sailing through time to its eternal port in heaven, will never capsize-not because those in the boat won't do everything sinfully possible to overturn it but because Christ, who is captain of the boat, will never allow it to happen.

The magnitude of the current scandal might be such that some will find it difficult to trust priests in the same way as in the past. That is regrettable, though it might not be a completely bad thing. Yet you must never lose trust in Christ! It is his Church. After Judas's death the eleven apostles convened; the Holy Spirit chose Matthias to take Judas's place, and he proclaimed the gospel faithfully until he was martyred for it. In the same way today, even if some of those the Lord chose have betrayed him, he will call others who will be faithful, who will serve you with the love with which you deserve to be served.

This is a time in which all of us need to focus ever more on holiness. We are called to be saints, and how much our society needs to see this beautiful, radiant face of the Church! You are part of the solution-a crucial part. And as you go forward in Mass to receive from the priest's anointed hands the sacred body of your Lord, ask Christ to fill you with a real desire for sanctity, a real desire to show his true face.

One of the reasons I am a priest today is because when I younger I was under-impressed with some of the priests I knew. I watched them celebrate Mass and with little reverence drop the body of the Lord onto the paten, as if they were handling something of small value rather than the Creator and Savior of all, rather than my Creator and Savior. I remember praying, "Lord, please let me become a priest, so I can treat you like you deserve!" It kindled in me a great fire to serve the Lord.

Maybe this scandal can kindle in you the same thing. If you choose, this scandal can lead you down to the path of spiritual suicide. But it should inspire you to say finally to God, "I want to become a saint so that I and the Church can give your name the glory it deserves, so that others might find in you the love and the salvation that I have found."

Jesus is with us, as he promised, until the end of time. He is still in the boat. Just as out of Judas's betrayal he achieved the greatest victory in the universe-our salvation through his passion, death and resurrection-so out of this new scandal he may bring, wants to bring, a new rebirth of holiness, a new Acts of the Apostles for the twenty-first century, with each of us-and that includes you-playing a starring role. Now is the time for real men and women of the Church to stand up. Now is the time for saints. How will you respond?

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

To My Brothers

If its one thing I learnt in my journey to where I am today, it is that people dissapoint you, people hurt you, people cheat you, people mock you. People have the power to inflict a lot of pain on you in so many ways so many times. Which is why I realise the importance of family. Family to me, is another category of 'people'.
It is in this category of people, that I do my best to not harbour any hatred of any sort towards no matter the circumstances. I repeat, NO MATTER the circumstances. This implies that you both, being 'people' are still in the position to do what 'people' do me, but I have placed you in another level of relationship. And though I do show my anger so many times, let me assure you, these feelings do not evolve into
hate.

Forgive me for the times I complained about you,
I know there are many things to complain about me.
Forgive me for the times I said I was dissapointed with you,
I know I have dissapointed you as well.
Forgive me for when I said unkind words to you,
maybe I received my share of it and didnt give it much thought when I did the same.
Forgive me for when I showed my temper to you,
I know there were times when you could have shown it too but didnt.
Forgive me if I have to be the one with the rules,
the implementation of it does not come willingly.
Forgive me if I appear to be such a goody two shoes,
maybe I thought I had to provide a positive image.
Forgive me for when I neglected you,
maybe I too feel neglected and find other ways of filling the void.
Forgive me if I come home with a cloud over me,
maybe I couldnt let it rain when people were around.
Forgive me if I dissaprove of the things you do,
maybe my approval is hard to give when it comes to someone you care for.

Saturday, March 19, 2005

She's Leaving On a Jet Plane

Without realising it, my mom's visit made the house feel like home. There was no friendly face to welcome me back after uni (my bro's face runs parallel to the computer screen), no warm meal waiting to be served during dinner (my meals are room temperature), no one forcing me to eat more so there wont be any leftovers. I think I spent more time with her here compared to back when I was in Msia. Something about Msia makes u wanna go out and do stuff. The itchy feeling you get that can't be satisfied with Astro or Streamyx. Maybe it's something about this expensive place of a country-NZ that brings people together. Finding other things to do that don't require external sources of entertainment which directly encourages you to spend and spend. Sure I miss the noise in Pasar Malam, the cancerous fumes from the fuel guzzling generators, the sardine like LRTs and the el cheapo stuff in Pasar Seni, and the tong sui from Desa Setapak, and the Fried Kuey Teow and Pan Mee and Laksa and satay and roti canai and .......ok.(Wipes drool)ICE KACANG!....come to me!!!!
AHEM!*COUGH COUGH* My point is, Im gonna severely miss my Mom. Severely.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Teach Me, Someone

How do people hear insults, not from strangers, but from close ones and not let it affect them? Some friends of mine have the ability to just 'forget' the bad stuff that happened and move on with little effort.
I heard once, "I did it for you cos I took pity on you" And now when friends are nice to me, I think, am I being pitied?
I heard once, "You're boring" and I try so hard now to squeeze a laugh out of people without considering the effects of it.
I heard once, "You're so sensitive" and when I notice someone doesnt look right, I think twice about asking whats wrong.
I heard once, "You're fat" and I think now if I would have more friends if I had lost weight earlier.

On another note, is it called abandoning a friend with whom you actually get peace of mind avoiding? You don't mind the occasional exchange of words, but what if you actually feel more comfortable not speaking to them? What if you feel that with other people, you're not so restricted, more relaxed, less conscious about what you do or say cos when that person's around, it feels as if you're being judged?

Saturday, March 12, 2005

Well, its like this

So why issit that some people do their last assignments last minute, get average results, and do excellent in exams while others are excellent in toiling and sweating to study and finish their assignments early and only do average in exams?

So why issit some people can get so much attention with so little real charisma while others try to show their sincerity and get no love?


Well, I dunno, but I do know everything happens for a reason, so divinely complex, our finite brains imbued with jealosy, hate, injustice and other bad stuff cannot possibly understand. So, on with life.

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Series of Unfortunate Events with Fortunate Friends

10am : Locked ourselves out of the house.
How? I opened my car door, went back into the house bringing the keys, left it on the kitchen counter to throw some rubbish. Went back out to the car, forgetting my keys, my brother followed me from behind and locked the door behind him. Voila. 2 people stuck outside.
Solution? Went to my neighbours who had a spare set of keys.

11:30am Punctured 2 (TWO, DUA, no-le, ni, er) car tyres - one on the front, one behind.
How? I was teaching my brother how to drive before he had to go to work. He hit the curb, very hard. A loud hissing sound followed, air has a thing for not staying in tyres once there's a big gaping hole in them.
Solution? Here's the fun part. We both didnt notice TWO tyres were punctured. Thinking only one tyre needed replacing, we both walked home (30 mins to and fro) to retrieve a car jack. Upon returning to the car, we noticed the other punctured tyre. My phone battery died, my brother didnt bring his phone.(Why didnt he bring his phone? I dunno, I dunno I dunno) Frustration made me make my brother walk back home to call a tow truck. One hour later, he comes back with our next door neighbour telling me the tow truck cant be sent cause there's an insurance issue. The neighbour gives me a lift home.
2pm: I arrive home, give the company a call, ready to yell, but I had no difficulty getting a tow truck from the same company my brother called. (Why couldnt he get the tow truck? I dunno I dunno I dunno) My brother tells me he MUST go to work (He had to go to work at 12pm see) At this point he's blaming me saying if I hadnt FORCED him to drive, this wouldnt have happened. Reluctant to ask the neighbour for another lift, I resort to asking for help from Caleb. Caleb isnt in. I call Kenneth.(My uni friend, not my brother not my brother not my brother) He was concerned and immediately came over to my place with Cindy. They give my brother a lift to his work place, and get me back to my car so I can wait for the tow truck.
4pm: The car's towed back to my house. Cindy and Kenneth made me forget the whole crappy afternoon. We went shopping in Countdown, went back to Cindy's place, had some meat pie, a strawberry cheesecake followed by some Pepsi and watched Alfie. (THANKS CINDY AND KENNETH!)Cindy's brother offers to help me check the prices of tyres.
7pm: Called to apologise to Kenny. He waited for me in uni cos we were spose to do an asgmnt together. Thing is, I couldnt get in the labs, so he had to wait outside to let me in. He waited out for 30 mins. He couldnt call me cos my phone batt. died.
He ALSO offered to help me take my mom from the airport this Tuesday seeing that I'll never replace my tyres on time.
8:30pm: Caleb comes over with his spare tyre since I only have one. I can now drive to a garage with my 2 punctured tyres. Otherwise, I'd have to get someone to drive me to a garage to buy 2 replacement tyres. Now I can at least drive my car.

Well...what can I say? Thanks people of Pakuranga. Thanks from the bottom of my heart. Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks

Thursday, March 03, 2005

Power Within

This came to me while I was lying down. (Usually the weirdest thoughts go across my mind in the most randomest times.)
So I was thinking, we're just human beings. Yea..emphasis on the word 'just'. We can't do much in the wild. No claws/fangs/camouflage/poison etc. Without clothes, we'll freeze/burn. In any case, we have the power to procreate. Yea...to bring a new life, a new soul into the world. This power is way better than sending a man to the moon, or building great skyscrapers. No animal can make another soul. And the thing is, the soul cant die! How many things can man make which lasts forever? Fancy.

On another note; I got this from a friend's blog. Quite a close friend.
"Life is NOT fair.
Life is NOT beautiful.
Life is NOT smooth.

Also...

Life CAN BE lonely.
Life CAN BE short.
Life CAN BE hard.

So...

Take heart! Don't give up! Don't kill yourself worrying and being sad about what life is, but take a deep breath, force a smile on your face and walk out there and live! Everyone's lonely at some time. Everyone has some problems. Everyone doesn't love everyone else. You are not alone. So you know what? Lets walk it together. Its not easy, its not smooth, its not instant... but we can do it... really... together."
Sounds very lovey doveyish, right? But he makes a point there. No one can really offer the answers or solutions, but you don't have to face everything alone. Go Chris!

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Anger

Should I not care when I've angered someone? I've been called too sensitive, for not just being able to forget about how I did wrong and carrying on as if nothing happened. Even as I type this, a sense of illogical reasoning seems to govern the statement made. As far as I've been raised by my parents, after you do something wrong to offend someone, you a)apologise b)make it right c)try not to repeat it again. Carrying on as if nothing happened is a definite no-no. Well, I've been called other things before, but I think the moral of the story is, you shouldnt try to hard to please everybody, neither can you take into account what people say about you too much. At the end of the day, it is you yourself whom you're gonna go home to.
I went to have a look at Sirach (I like this book) and in Chapter 27 verse 30: "Anger and a hot temper are horrible things, but sinners have both" later on in 28:8 it says "If you stay out of arguments, you will not sin so much, because a hot temper gets them started" I think having met people who almost never display their anger was a good influence on me. But Im in need of 'booster' shots.