More gibberish to those who have no idea

Somewhere along the way, I let a lot of things get to me. I can't say Im that different a person, but in all honesty, I don't think Im similiar to the Kevin 3 years ago.
The Kevin 3 years ago would have helped almost anyone in need. He'd ask if there was a problem if he sensed it, even if it was tinged with paranoia, but he made sure that the concern surfaced. The Kevin 3 years ago may have been a pushover, may have been oversensitive, may have been annoying, may have been unsociable.
And the Kevin now may all be that still, but with more added ...bitterness.
Somewhere along the way, he encountered hurtful situations, painful lessons, and this turned into short termed anger, and long term hatred and bitterness. There was loss, loss again, and betrayal. But I realise now though, it was not my fault that these things happened to me, it was my fault for not doing my best to heal. I let the wound stay there. Hey, I thought it was only a minor 'cut', dealt by one of life's lessons. How wrong and naive I was. This 'cut' had become a festering wound. By trying to forget the past, I continued to let it haunt me, literally, I'd wake in the middle of the night with tears in my eyes streaming down my cheeks, and I wouldnt know why or where this source of pain or sorrow originated from. Im quite sure I know where it comes from now.

I don't know why, but today, this person said he/she hated what I'd given he/she as a sincere present sometime ago. Why he/she said it? I don't know. Did he/she mean it? I don't know, and I won't ask, BECAUSE, the whole time I knew this person, more bad things were said to me than good. Is he/she pretending to be mean? I don't know either. We're not talking about constructive criticism here, we're talking about plain mean things. Sticks and stones...bla bla bla? Well, not for me, words from people that matter, matter to me. But I guess, not anymore...if the person doesn't 'matter' to you, neither will he/she say matter too. Sad thing is...he/she mattered greatly, tremendously, vastly to me.

Putting something past you is different, way, way different from running away from the problem. When something is put 'past' you, you don't look back anymore....when you 'run' away, you continuously look behind, to see if 'its' catching up with you, and thats why, when you run, eventually, you'll come to a dead end. Tomorrow, Im gonna try to 'stitch' part of the big gaping wound.